Worm Pong?


It’s about that time.

BAM. Dose two.

Today marks week four of my helminthic experiment. As previously discussed in hardly any detail, I’m staggering my doses in an effort to keep these babies in mah belly. Cuz let’s face it. Nothing likes to hang around my hostile intestinal tract. Not even me. But the point I am trying to make is… let’s get this party started.

Could I have daintily sipped them out of my plastic cup of lukewarm water again? Sure.

Could I promise you never to use the word daintily again? Absolutely.

But then I would have to admit that A) I am no fun, and B) my vocab is far too limited to actually promise you that.

Instead, let me introduce to a new kind of drinking game:

Worm Pong.

While I’ve never actually played Beer Pong, or Beirut … whatever the cool kids are calling it these days… It occurred to me that some people are of the notion that drinking til they puke their guts out is hardcore.

I don’t think so kids. Throw back a few parasites and call me in the morning.

Steady… steady…

Nailed it.

Before we move on, please note that the fleshly looking thing on my right arm is not some weird growth. It’s just a band-aid, guys. I had some blood work done today and neglected to remove it before all the excitement.

I hope it establishes some street cred though.

“Dose Dos”

So maybe I’m a little ridiculous, but the way I see it, you can’t stop living your life… even if you’re barely “living.” I really don’t know how in the world drinking blood suckers is funny, but tonight it was hilarious. Don’t ever stop laughing. Most of all, don’t go into a new therapy hopeless, even if it is your last hope. It just. might. work. “So cheer up pal, it’s christmas.”

But… how IS it going anyway??

Glad I asked for you.

A: Pretty well. Since I last updated three weeks ago, the “brain fog” I described has, thankfully, lifted. I’m not nearly as nauseous in the mornings, though I am pretty darn tired most of the time. I’m no stranger to exhaustion so if this is just a blessing from my UC or from the worms, I can’t really tell.

Interestingly, on day 13 (the day the worms allegedly hatch and migrate to the colon) I had a bowel movement of just straight up blood. Now, I’m well acquainted with this type of .. poop?.. but since I had/have been bleeding only occasionally/minimally, that was a surprise.Β  It hasn’t happened again since. So we’ll chalk it up to the worms.

Cool! πŸ™‚

Stools continue to be formed but soft, going 4-7x a day now (due to it being “that time” of the month) WHOA TMI TMI…. calm down gentleman I didn’t even say the word “period.”

err… woops.

and the urgency to get to a bathroom in .5 seconds or less is still like a 10. STILL on the 15mgs. of prednisone. This staggered dose program makes it hard to taper as soon as I’d like, but whaddah ya gonna do. So there it is. No shocking details or revelations or interesting happenings yet. It’s still early though so I’m not getting too antsy… just glad to have 400 more worm babies getting comfortable in my gut & hoping they play nice with the seniority.

**no actual worms were harmed during this game, they are far too expensive to be throwing stuff into πŸ˜‰


12 responses to “Worm Pong?

  1. You are so funny! Though I don’t blame you for being so giddy with the results of the therapy!

    Btw, I had the same “day 13.” It was too weird to be regular Colitis symptoms.

    • I know! I can hardly wait to see if it works! Its so weird that you had the same day 13. How have you been since? I read some of your blog the other day… great title! Super witty, too πŸ™‚ … can I add you to my blog roll?

  2. Great blog. Your blog is fun to read! Any updates?

  3. Absolutely! We’re all trying to link each other up! And a lot of us are close to the same stages, too! Maybe it was the Dr. Oz bump. It was for me, anyway.

    Things are going good. I’ll keep blogging, of course. I find it therapeutic. πŸ™‚


  4. sooo… your amazing! and i totally love that you type just like you talk!! hahaha. ❀ you!!!

  5. anonymous female

    this is an old blog/post. I just came across it.

    have you tried, or heard of, SCD/GAPS?

    or of VSL#3? http://shop.vsl3.com/vsl3-ds-20-pack—prescription-only-p17.aspx

    some people take 4 packets of VSL#3 / day. (which is pricey, so I imagine its a temporary dose). but that comes out to 3.6-trillion probiotic organisms per day.

    good luck to you

    • Hi! Thanks for your suggestions. I tried the SCD for two years, and I have also done the GAPS diet. I was taking high doses of VSL #3 for about two years as well. I mention fecal transplants in a later post on this blog and was ready to try it, however I found something else that worked before I went through with FT. Great suggestions though! Those things are definitely a must-try for everyone with UC.

  6. anonymous female

    oops. also meant to mention one other thing.

    in case you havent read/heard about ~ fecal transplants.


    take care

  7. anonymous female

    Thank for the reply. my friend has UC and she is just starting SCD. and I mentioned VSL3 to her recently. what did you do instead of the FT if you don’t mind me asking? would you still consider yourself to have UC, or did it heal? –sorry if too many questions! πŸ™‚

  8. I still have digestive issues, although they are certainly no where near the severity of the full-blown case of UC I struggled with for years. If you continue to read the next several posts, I outline what I did to get better. If you have any more specific questions I would be glad to answer them!

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